Thursday, March 29, 2012

We Live by Faith, Not by Sight: Practicum Reflection


How do I even begin to reflect on my practicum experience?


Towards the end of my experience at Africa New Life, I sat with headmaster and 4 of the upper level students. As we all sat there, headmaster said to us, “You don’t realize the impact and impression you have had on these students until right before you leave.” He said, “All the students talk about how great their Mzungu teachers are and how much they love you.” As we continued talking with two of the boys sitting with us, one of the boys asked me, “So, what do you like best about Rwanda?” That is when I realized…it is the PEOPLE! At my practicum, the parts of Rwanda that I have experienced have been very community oriented. Can we generalize for everyone? No. But, neighbors help neighbors. People take time for each other. If they are in the middle of a conversation but they have a meeting, they will stay and finish their conversation and go late to the meeting. Through  being at my practicum, I have come to admire that! It made me realize that what I am really going to miss about practicum are the people here. I have been struggling with being excited about the whole experience, but sitting and talking with those boys made the whole month worth it. It made all the experience click in my head as to the impression they had on my life. Am I going to miss the teaching? No, I can’t say I am. I think what was really frustrating to me was the fact that the classroom was so impersonal. A “together” based community surrounds me, but in the classroom you lose that. Never did I get to simply talk to my kids or even find out all of their names because of the chaos of having 55+ students in my classroom. Was the teaching horrible? Overall, I guess not, but it had its horrible moments. Did I look forward to getting into the classroom each day to teach? No, I didn’t so that has got me thinking…


I have really been struggling recently with what to do about my major. Do I go more toward the Child counseling or something along those lines where I get to talk to kids and really get to know them? Or, will I feel differently in America where there are less students and you can get to know them a a little better? All this being said, regardless of how you approach the relationship with your students in the classroom,  the classroom definitely puts limits on relationships because of the professionalism you must maintain in the work field. Also, there is just a certain relationship that comes about between teachers and students and that is not something you can really help.


As I try to make sense of all of these thoughts, I am trying to answer the question, "what is it that I like about children?" I love experiencing their personalities, seeing them smile, and finding out what drives them. I want to make a difference in the lives of children. I want to give hope to children who have lost hope whatever the reason may be. 

I have really been trying to place this decision on God's shoulders and allow him to lift the weight off my shoulder. In my heart, I want to be a Child Life Specialist and not an Elementary School teacher, but the thing that concerns me is that I will get to the end and wish I would have stuck with Education. My entire life I have said I was going to be an elementary school teacher, and now look where I am. In an email from Amber, she expressed that maybe God isn't telling me to give up education, he is just showing me that it may not be a 40 year career for me and that is okay.

So, with signing up with classes this friday, I have the stressful feeling that I must choose right now. Yesterday morning, I woke up early and just spent some time doing some prayer writing and then I went on a prayer run. God really just keeps speaking to me about the concept of time. He made me realize that maybe I don't have to choose. For now, I will stick out the education major and minor in human development and family sciences. Will I finish in 4 years? HOPEFULLY! But so what if I don't? I don't need to be worrying that far in advance.


It is hard being in this limbo. I really want to dive into the stuff for my Child and Life Services minor, but junior year education classes do not allow me to do that until j-term and second semester. I really just need to rely on the plans that God has for me. He has sucked me into a whirlwind that is challenging me to rely on Him 100% of the time in mind, body, and spirit. He is challenging me to live by faith and not just by the sights of what are present in the here and now.


Now a few other things:


-MY MAC IS WORKING AGAIN! No clue how or why, but it is awesome. That being said, look at my Facebook for a butt load of pictures to be uploaded. The internet is struggling to upload pictures to my blog, but i will as soon as possible!


-Check back here in a few days to read a blog post about my trip to Uganda


-I put together a short newsletter to sum up my time on practicum! If you would like to read it, just let me know and I will send it to you. I could not get the word document attached. P.S. It is much shorter :)


My love and prayers go out to all of you!


Ali

Monday, March 19, 2012

Last Novel, I SWEAR! Day 15-28

THIS IS THE LAST NOVEL! It is currently Monday afternoon here and I will be leaving Practicum early Wednesday morning. That means a few things:
a) I will have internet more consistently 
b) There will be no more novels, and I will be back to regular blogging about thoughts 
c) I am onto my last 3rd of my time here in Rwanda
d) I will be headed to Uganda for 4 days (Thursday-Sunday) to do some white water rafting on the Nile

Well here is my life, no details left out from the past 2 weeks :)

March5, 2012: Practicum Day 15
On Mondays, I don’t have class until after lunch, so in the morning, after I ran and showered, I went to sponsorship. For our run this morning, we went back into more rural areas of Kayonza. It is incredible to see how the structure of houses changes as we ran back further into the villages. The houses become more worn down with holes in the mud and no doors. As we ran back further, we saw more children who looked like they were not on their way to school which meant their families couldn’t afford it or needed their help around the house.
At lunch, we sat with some of the other teachers. While we ate and drank from our water bottles, they informed us that in Rwanda, you do not drink with your meal. You drink after your meal so that the liquids do not fill you up. They drink after so that they can eat as much as possible during meal time and will not grow hungry as soon.
I had P3 Oink at 1:15 for a double. The topic for the next 2 days is the alphabet. I started by putting the alphabet on the board and the kids copied it down. I sang them our alphabet song, and they joined in. While we were singing, our versions didn’t match up. The way they sing their alphabet differs and I believe that is because of the trouble they have pronouncing r’s, l’s and a few other letters. After they had it copied down, I went through and asked them to name a word that began with each letter. I took several examples from several different answers to try to engage more students in the lesson. I then gave them some exercises and finished the class by handing out their quizzes. About half way through my class, Kelli’s teacher, Teacher Julius, came in and asked where teacher Rita was. He felt as though she should be in the room to keep the behavior in check. He is absolutely right in terms of behavior! Teacher Rita came in part of the way through class and sat in the back of the room doing her own work. When she showed up, they worked much more quietly! We checked over their quizzes, I collected them back, and the teacher responsible for P3 Pink will put them in their files.

P3 Orange did not go as well. Teacher Rita did not come and they behaved very poorly. I began class the same way, but they were way too noisy to get through the verbal activities. The students would just not work or write things down. It is very difficult to be teaching and writing on the chalk board and have 59 students behind you that you have to make sure are writing.  We did not get through the exercises so I assigned the work they would not do in class for homework.

Teaching here gets very frustrating because I want to do fun things with my classes and give them a taste of the American teaching style, but I can’t because of the school structure. Their behavior does not allow me to do interactive/hands on activities. Kelli and I were talking about how picture books and creative writing really do play a positive role in the cognitive development of children. These resources help children develop as learners. These children do not have the resources or use the creative writing method, thus children struggle to picture things in their heads. Their learning is very black and white.

We went out after classes to get some bananas, avocados, crackers, chocolate, and a box of water. It is nice to have some snacks in the room that offer a different flavor than rice and beans. Then we watched Lost, journaled, and wrote some lesson plans.

At dinner we talked to John Bosco and he shared his testimony with us. His African name is Habimana, meaning, “God is forever in my life.” He is a 19 year old boy who has a strong heart for God. Before going back to school in 2006, he lived on the streets in Kigali, finding work wherever possible. In 2006, he met an American woman who began sponsoring him. From 2006 to 2009 he attended a public school and in 2009 he came to Africa New Life. He expressed to us several times that his sponsor changed his life. He calls his sponsor “Mom.” You always here in the sponsorship ads, “You can change a child’s life.” It is completely different to hear it from a child’s mouth. I wish that everyone could hear the testimonies of these children and see firsthand how sponsoring a child is a blessing. We also talked with John Bosco about what he wants to go to college for. He said that he originally wanted to be a politician, but they have t lie and aren’t at peace. He wants to be a doctor to help people and minister while he does it. He has only been studying English since he was 15 and now he is striving to attend Yale. He truly is an incredible, hardworking boy!

I have been going through Romans 9 and one main theme was about being children of God. We are not simply children of God; we are offspring because we are children of the promise.

March 6, 2012: Practicum Day 16
Thursdays, I don’t have class until9:45-11:15 with Pink. Today is my day of 2, hour and a half classes. With Pink, I started by explaining vowels and consonants. I wrote the vowels on the board, then the consonants, and then had them copy both sets of letters into their notebooks. They had trouble understanding that vowels are not consonants. After that, I had them do exercises related to filling in either a vowel or a consonant into a word (ex: c_w or _encil). To try and make class a little more exciting, I cut out papers with the letters A-Z on them, drew dashes on the board, and had students place the letters in the correct spots. For the students who had not gotten a turn yet, I handed them a small slip of paper with a word on it. One at a time, I asked them to come up to the board, read the word to the class, and point to either the first or last letter of the word.

Unfortunately, the students do not understand the concept of turn taking. Before we started the activity, I informed them that they would all get a turn.  They would stand up and scream, “teacher me, teacher me!” If I do not have the entire class engaged in spelling something or reciting as a class, they do not pay attention and will break off in chatter. Teacher Rita was there or the beginning of class, but she left right before the activity.  I finished off the class by giving the students more exercises to complete.

After class, I went back to sponsorship where I met Papa Bill, one of the head members on the board of directors for Africa New Life. He has all the faith in the world in this school and the progress that it has made. He sponsors 18 children, giving them hope for a brighter future.   

For Orange, I completed the same lesson with them but instead of doing the letter activity, we went over their quizzes.  We did not go over their quizzes until today because of the way the time tables work out. I went over the whole thing because there were many students who struggled on different parts of the exam. The students had a hard time paying attention throughout the entire class. Teacher Rita was there for the majority of the time and went around smacking kids on the head or pulling their ears if they were not behaving.

After work, Kelli and I watched some Lost and ate avocado with Marie crackers. BEST AFTEROON SNACK!  Bellis, Christine, and Alian came over a little later and wanted to watch The Notebook, so we put it in for them. After dinner, I worked on lesson plans. The evening was extremely frustrating trying to figure out how to teach comparatives for the next three days.   Teaching comparatives requires me to first explain nouns, and adjectives, and then syllables. The only resources I have to plan off of is a small book that has three pages in it and the broken internet. I have no idea how to teach these students.  I want to do fun things with them, but they don’t behave well, and they simply don’t understand hands on learning.  I wrote a grammar formula, (noun), (adjective + er), (than), (noun), but I have to ensure that they understand pieces of grammar before I can explain comparatives. They are learning English as a second language and many don’t understand simple English words, let alone grammatical structures. I will do my best and see how they take it. It has been a frustrating day of students not listening and lesson planning.

Mach 7, 2012: Practicum Day17
Today was a pretty typical day. I had class at 8:30 with Pink teaching the students comparatives. Before starting the lesson, I had to do a mini lesson on what a noun was and what an adjective was. Teacher Rita did not come, but the class behaved rather well. We were able to get through the material and they understood more than I was expecting them to. For my other class, Orange, I had an hor and a half. I started their period by doing the ABC card activity with them. For this class, I handed out a card to every student before the activity even started in hopes that they would understand that they would each get a turn. They took well to that approach, and the activity went more smoothly with this class. As far as comparatives with this class, they did not understand it as well. They did not pay attention very well so they were filling in opposites instead of comparing the two objects I drew. I really think the performance of a class depends on the length and time of day of the class. Orange was an hour and a half right before lunch today, which means they have already been sitting in class since 7am and are getting antsy. I don’t really blame them, but it is very frustrating as a teacher.

We has a teacher meeting during tea time, where head master informed us that the entire board of directors would be coming out tomorrow for the day. We are having an assembly and teachers are to be in their best dress. He also informed us that our teacher devotion time would be spent praying at the land/for the land that they want to build a new high school on. I am excited to have them come out and experience this as both an insider and an outsider. I am an insider in the sense that I am currently a teacher here, but I am an outsider because I am only here short term and have not been a part of their past success (top school in the country) that they are currently celebrating.

After lunch, Kelli and I spent time on lesson plans until 2:45 when I headed to work at sponsorship. Kelli got sent back from class because the primary school was spending the afternoon deep cleaning the classrooms for when the visitors come tomorrow.

Trying to communicate here can get very frustrating. When I speak to someone in Kinyarwanda out on the streets, they will respond but then turn to whoever they are walking with and laugh. It makes me feel self-conscious because I question whether I said the right word or if I pronounced it correctly.

After talking to John Bosco the other night, I have been thinking about the diversity of people here at Africa New Life and the diversity of the people in God’s creation. Everyone comes here with a different story, something that drives them or defines who they are thus far. It amazes me, the beauty of it all and has made me realize that we have been created in HIS image and we are wonderfully made.

I have been working on being in prayer on a more constant basis. It is my prayer that God will build me up and strengthen me in prayer so that I can draw closer to Him. I learn through prayer and I feel God’s power through prayer. I want to increase in prayer, not decrease.

March 8, 2012: Practicum Day 18
VISITORS TODAY!  It was a very exciting day for the school as a whole. I taught at 7:45 and I enjoyed teaching or the first time!  Teacher Rita didn’t come, but the class behaved very well. This class, we focused on doing more work with comparatives.  If an adjective is one syllable, you add –er, and if a word is two or more syllables, you say more ____. They enjoyed the humor of the lesson. I would say things like, “I am more beautifuler!” in a ridiculous way. The animation I used to teach the lesson made them see that “beautifuler” is a crazy word. I taught them to put their hand beneath their chin in order to determine how many syllables a word is. Then when they figured out how many syllables, they could add –er or “more ____.” They understood and caught on to the technique very well and they behaved! It was encouraging, and I thank God for that because it was only by His grace.

After class, I worked at sponsorship before our assembly. The assembly was to recognize the presence of the board members. The students sang and hen all the board members were introduced, teachers were recognized, and students were acknowledged as a whole. The board was very moved by the students and being on the African New Life campus.

After the assembly I went back and taught classes while the board visited different classrooms. One stopped by my room, but only for a short period. Then, Kevin came into my room and took some videos and pictures of me teaching which will be fun to have.

For lunch, we ate with the board and the top 20 students at the school, most of which are the top students in all of Rwanda.  In P6 and Secondary 3, students take national exams and these 20 students had some of the top scores.  John Bosco was number two in all of Rwanda for Secondary 3.  Bellis also scored very high and Touch, one of the boys I live with, was 8th for Primary 6.  This school takes pride in its students, and it should! I had been praying that God would use this gathering as a time of fellowship, bringing His people together, and He did! The pastor spoke at the lunch saying,  “Sponsors don’t even realize that they are praising God through their actions, but they are.” They are because they are giving our children here the opportunity to celebrate by thanking God for His blessings. These children are drawn nearer to God by the opportunity to have an education.” What a beautiful thing!

Kelli and I met several of the board members and told them about why we are here and what we are doing.

After all was over, the ANL administration took the board on a tour of the campus. Kelli and I took that time to go to the internet cafĂ©.  Our internet does not work well, most likely because of an anchor that was dropped on the line in the ocean that runs to Rwanda, Uganda, and 4 other countries.  We pay 300 franc for 1 hour and can take our own computers to hook up.

For the night, we watched Lost, did lesson plans and journaled. Touch and Odilio came to our room to hang out for a bit. Kelli showed the, pictures of our trip thus far and I talked to my mom for a bit.

March 9, 2012: Practicum Day 19
8:30am class with Pink. I spent the class going over the syllable information we did yesterday, then I gave them an exercise that require them to write how many syllables and then add –er or put more ___ depending on the number of syllables. They could figure out how many syllables, but they struggled with turning it into a comparative. They struggle, but I also struggle with finding another way to explain it to them.  After class, Mike called me and I had my phone in my skirt pocket for some reason so I was fortunate enough to answer it. After talking to him for a bit, I met with Teacher Rita to get the topics that I will be doing revision on next week. I will be prompting revision all next week because they begin end of the terms exam the week of the 19th.

With orange, I taught the same lesson on syllables and comparatives. Some of the students understood, but many struggled. I had many kid saying “more beautifuler” or “more faster.” Most of them would not pay attention, so the few that were paying attention, I brought to the chalkboard and went over the correct answers with them.

After lunch, we relaxed for the afternoon. At 2:30, we went to meet the other teachers for the FACULTY SOCCER GAME!

For the game, tons of our students came to watch our faulty play against the teachers of IPM School down the street. The field consisted of some medal poles to make the goal, and a dirt “square” with some patches of grass and no lines. When we all got there, Darius gave us our jerseys which were brand new. Mine was an XXXXL white jersey with maroon trim. Other than being a dress, it served its purpose rather well. This game was a big step in my life. I wore my hair in a successful pony braid for the first time! Big day! J They say that their formation is a 4-4-2, but I would say they play with more of a 3-3-4 because of how far players moved out of position. They put me at the left wing. Thanks to my MWS training, winger means that I make runs forward getting end line, but I also have to cover back and defend. Well, any tie I came back to defend, the guy that was playing defense told me to push up further. When I try to compare the style of play in this game, I most closely relate it to is when you kick the ball in the air as high as you can and you only have one touch. The game was pretty humorous. The ref would call whatever, whenever kind of like our Elite 8 game this year for the NCAA tournament. For corners, he would draw a diagonal line up the field, clearly not a straight line from the post. We tied 1-1 and it was fun to play with my colleagues and in front of my students, but it made me love MWS even more. Kelli hung out on the sidelines with kids swarmed around her asking questions about America. After the game, we headed back to campus with the other team to share some Fanta and conversation. It sounds as though these two teams really appreciated the opportunity to play against one another. The whole system is set up very similar to that of high school sports in America. The teachers are set up to play against other teams of teachers around the area.

As I have been continuing on with my experience here at ANL, it has been my prayer that I will allow God to guide my future. I pray that he will take away the stress of deciding on a career path and a major. I know that He will guide me and I pray that I allow Him to do that. All I must do is follow God because in the end, His will shall be done.

March 10, 2012: Practicum Day 20
This morning, we did the impossible! We slept in until 8am. When I woke up, I checked my email and read my book for African Literature Class. Around 10, Kelli and I headed out to the market to buy some avocado, and then we went to our water lady to get boxes of water and Marie biscuits and Nice Cookies (Coconut! So good). When we came back, we finished season 2 of Lost and then I read some more before heading to lunch.

Today was center day on campus which means that all children who are sponsored through Africa New Life Ministries come and have revision/tutoring for the day. This happens on all ANL campuses, so depending on where children live will determine which campus they attend and where their paperwork is filed. We had no idea that it was center day (because they don’t tell us anything around here) so when we went to lunch, there were tons and tons of kids in the dining hall. Most of them weren’t used to seeing Mzungu’s around campus so they stared at us until we were done. Then for the rest of the afternoon I finished “Say you’re One of Them.”

We went to dinner around 6:30 and ate the usual, rice and beans. We wanted to make popcorn for our boys so we ventured back into the kitchen with our popcorn seeds to see if the kitchen staff could help us out. All of their stoves run off of burning wood and their pots are so big, they remind me of witch’s pots. We threw some popcorn seeds in a pot with some oil and then one of the cooks shook it around because all they use as potholders are pieces of brown paper bag. The kitchen staff doesn’t speak much English which made this whole process a little difficult. When the popcorn was sitting on the fire, it wasn’t covered and popcorn started flying everywhere.  Do to the language barrier, we could not simply tell them to cover it so they figured it out the hard way. After popcorn had already flown all over the place, they covered it. When we got it all made, we gave some to the people in the kitchen and then headed back to our house with the rest. When we walked in, all 18 boys were sitting in the family room waiting for us. I turned to Kelli and said, “Do we have a cup that we can use to hand this out?” She replied, “No they will be fine.” Well, that was a mistake. I set the popcorn down on the coffee table, said “Don’t kill each other,” and they went insane! Popcorn was flying everywhere! One boy took the bowl, ran into his room and dumped the remains down his shirt. Even though it was crazy, it is so much fun to do these little things for our boys because it is such a treat for them. After the craziness of the popcorn, we stuck a movie in (which is a film with horrible Kinyarwanda voice overs and English subtitles) for them and headed back to the dining hall because they were having dance offs. Their favorite music to play is Justin Bieber, so they play the same songs on repeat for a while. It was so cute to watch these kids in an atmosphere that is looser than the classroom. So many of them love to dance and as they say, “Shake their bodies.” But being Mzungus, it was not okay for us to simply sit in the audience. They put on some J. Biebs and we did some mocarina, shopping cart, q-tip, fish hook, and all those party dance moves! They laughed. By the end, it was 9:30 so we headed back to our room to journal and get ready for bed! It is a nice change to be in a more fun, relaxed environment with these kids where they can see us as their friends, and not just their teachers.

Some great Scriptures I have come across recently:

Romans 12:2- “Do not conform to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:9-“Let love be genuine…”

Romans 12:12- “Rejoice in Hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”

Romans 12:21-“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

Romans 13:8-“the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.”

Romans 12:14-“Put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh…”

March 11, 2012:  Practicum Day 21
This morning, we went to church here in Kayonza. Headmaster presented the sermon. Like many Africans, he did a lot of talking in circles. The think I got out of the sermon was “trust in times of trials and tribulations.” He isn’t a pastor, so I found it interesting that he presented the sermon. As far as the worship songs were concerned, we sang 5 songs over the span of an hour and 15 minutes because we repeat the courses of songs so long.

The rest of the day was very relaxing. I started “The River Between” for Lit class and we watched Dreamer. Kevin came around 2:30 and brought us some movies on a hard drive and some cookies, muffins, and an ABC doughnut. HE came out because him and his practicum team are shooting an ANL promotional video with John Bosco. They were finished filming for the day around 5:20, so Kelli and I hopped a ride with them to Rwamagana to celebrate Sam’s birthday. We headed out there and she didn’t know we were coming which made it fun. We ate dinner at their house and then went to the One Stop Shop to buy some minutes, yogurts, and egg surprise. Egg surprise is a fried snack filled with a whole boiled egg and meat. On our way back to the Avega guesthouse, we blindfolded Sam because we were having a surprise party for her. Amina, the caretaker at Avega guesthouse, set up a room with lights, music and a cake. It was good to see everyone, and it was a nice break off of the ANL campus. After the party, we did some star tripping, which is when you spin in circles looking up at a specific star and then look at a flashlight and try to walk. Guarantee, you will fall over every time.

At 9pm, headmaster picked us up to take us back to the ANL campus because matatu’s don’t run that late. He’s kind of like our dad for the month, making sure that we are okay and that we don’t need anything. Very nice of him!

In My bible study, I read Romans 15:13, which says, “May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” This verse has so many powerful words! It speaks of hope, joy, peace, believing, power, and hope! God fills us with the ability to believe and then through that, the Holy Spirit kindles our flame in hope. Because we believe in something bigger than ourselves, we have hope for a brighter, stronger future.

March 12, 2012: Practicum Day 22
On Mondays, I don’t have classes in the mornings! Sarah Mast came over from being in Rwamagana for the night to visit us. She is one of our friends from Rwamagana who has been working for Procom for the last several months. It was fun to give someone a tour around a place that has been home to me for the last 4 weeks. After she left, we went to sponsorship to work for a bit. We finally finished the 1,600 files from US sponsors and we have moved on to the files of children who are sponsored through the UK. We were then informed that there would be no classes in the afternoon because the African New Life Staffs from the 3 different locations would be heading to the Muhazi Resort for a celebration with the board of directors. The lake was beautiful and the buildings were new. The entire resort was very serine and a nice place to relax. I got to see Kimmie, meet some of the people she works with, and enjoy some great food! As it got dark, the stars were absolutely incredible! I find my peace in looking to a clear night sky, full of stars, in awe of God’s incredible creation. We could see two planets (Mercury, Venus, or/and Jupiter). God’s creation is so vast.

Also today, we spoke with some people about our water project and there are indeed 4 water pumps in Kajeo. While they have 4 pumps, what they do not have is water that runs into the buildings on the school campus. That being said, our water project is still valid, but John Africa, our headmaster who assigned the project, has nothing to do with the project, so people feel bad that he assigned it to us.

As Mike and I talked over email, we were answering some questions. One was, Why are we not okay with being lukewarm Christians? It is such a good question to stop and answer. It is a challenge to reevaluate our faith and see where we are at in our relationship with God. I responded saying, “My faith is important to me because I know it has changed my life. It has saved me in more ways than one. Without my faith, I would not be sitting in Africa. I would not be at Messiah. I would not have you. I would be a completely different person. I would be okay with drinking, sex, and swearing. Why am I not? Because I want to live for something bigger than myself. I live for God who is unexplainable. There are a lot of things that I don't understand in this world. And by that I mean like academic things, reading big words, and all of that and I become overwhelmed by that. But when I turn to God, I am not overwhelmed, I am in awe. I just want to know it all. I just want to be in prayer all the time, read my bible all the time, but for some reason I don't. I feel like I have more things to do. My faith is important to me because I know that I am just a speck in this world. I would not be able to overcome situation without knowing that there is someone who has my back 100% of the time no matter what. God has no anger, and he forgives. He is there to run to when there is no one else. I know that he has a plan so when everything seems wrong, I can just say, "Hey God, please help me to stop stressing about my future. I have faith in you." FAITH! How do people who do not believe in God define grace or faith. I don't think it is possible.”

How would you respond?

Oh! And another part of the day…it rained the hardest I have ever seen it rain. It cooled everything off. It truly was incredible, but it made me understand why people do not leave their houses when it rains around here. Buckets and Buckets, but all a blessing for these people and their crops!

March 13, 2012: Practicum Day 23
I started my morning in sponsorship before heading to Pink at 9:45 for a double. Since we did not have class yesterday, the students spend the double writing down 40+ revision questions on opposites, plurals, ABC order, and prepositions. Then, they had to answer them. This class did a fairly good job at getting their work done and I was able to put the answers up at the end of class. I told them to correct their answers to match the board, but I do not think they understood that concept. It is extremely difficult to check 55+ books individually because while I am checking, the students have nothing else to do so they get noisy and start moving about the room and doing other things. By the end of class, I ended up having an extra 15 minutes because their next teacher didn’t show up. I went looking for him and found him sleeping in the staff room. After class, I headed back to sponsorship to finish off the morning.

My 1:15 Orange class was an absolute nightmare. To start off the class, at least 6 kids did not have pens and I old had 3 to lend out. I tried to tell them to write with their pencils, but they have been disciplined and trained to only write with pens and draw with pencils. Then, someone would steal another student’s book, or beat someone. During each of these incidents, I would have to stop teaching and attend to the situation. When there are 55+ students, there is always a problem. On top of all of it, they would simply not work. They had an hour and a half to get the same number of questions written down as the Pink class, and many of them only wrote down 10 of the questions. It was extremely frustrating!

After class, we escaped off of campus to the market. Tuesdays and Fridays are the two days of the week when the market is fully open with clothes, food, shoes, fabric, etc. We bought a piece of fabric from a woman that spoke no English by communicating with her through a calculator to barter down prices. When she said 8000 franc (approximately $16) for one strip, I said “Oya (no), 3000.” She did not agree so I walked away. As I walked away, she grabbed my arm to pull me back. We ended up getting 3 pieces (6 yards) for 9000 franc (approximately $18). Kelli and I split it in half. I wanted to have a piece from the Kayonza market for my quilt so that I have a memory from being here on internship.

We came back and I called my grandmother, Nanny, and talked with her for about a half hour. It was awesome to talk to her! I ran out of minutes while talking to her, so I ventured out to buy some more. A little later in the evening, Noella and Flower came over to visit and talk. They stayed until dinner and then we headed to dinner.

Tonight at dinner, we sat with the Chemistry/Biology teacher, Javira. He discussed with us how he is aspiring to go to medical school and become a heart surgeon. For a while, he lectured us about biology thinking that we knew everything that he was telling us.  People often speak to us as if we know everything because they want to come across as intelligent. Every once in a while, we have to say to them, “I am horrible at science, I don’t know much.” They often put us on as a superior just because we are Mzungus. Javira then sang the praises of American, born again Christians. He said that they worship God the most incredible way; he said this all because of a television sermon he saw. I find it sad when I hear these people talk about America as a superior because the reality is that America is just as broken in Rwanda.

March 14, 2012: Practicum Day 24
The day started with P3 Pink doing more revision. The topics of the day were abbreviations and odd man out. Teacher Rita sat in on class today because she heard that my Orange kids were bad yesterday. Pink behaved well and got the work done. Some of them struggled with understanding odd man out, but as soon as I prompted, “Do you drink milk? Do you drink water? Do you drink juice? Do you drink pen?” They understood. I think they had trouble understanding grouping/figuring out what they had in common. For abbreviations, they struggled with abbreviating “Doctor” and “Number.” While doing this exercise with them, I realized how complicated abbreviations are because there is no rhyme or reason to how they are formed.

Between classes, we had tea in the staff room and then I read a bit before heading to Orange. I had an hour and a half with Orange So I started by going over their work from yesterday that they didn’t finish because they were so bad. I went over the answers by playing a game. I walked around and took turns asking boys and then girls a question from yesterday’s class work. Aon Wednesdays, students can wear an alternative uniform that is shorts and a t-shirt. I accidentally thought that one of the little girls was a boy so I marked her point under the boys’ side. I played it off my putting one of the boys’ points under the girls’ side to make up for it. I felt so bad! After the game, I did the same abbreviation/odd man out questions. They struggled with the same questions as the Pink class. To go over them, I marked each book. .It worked out best that as they finished, I sat in one spot and collected them so that they were not all crowding around me. I marked what was wrong and then asked them to fix their work. I don’t think many of them actually fixed their work. This is another difficult aspect of having so many students; I cannot help struggling students on an individual basis.

After lunch, we watched Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close in our room (it was one that Kevin downloaded for us and put on the hard drive). After that, I went and worked in sponsorship for a big. Then until dinner, I took care of some emails and finished reading “The River Between.” We didn’t have power during dinner, so after dinner, we came back and hung out in the dark before journaling and heading to bed.

Since I have begun to get more comfortable with my surroundings here at ANL, I have noticed myself beginning to get complacent. As Christians, how do we keep our focus on God 100%? How do we remember to be in prayer even when things are going okay? I need to remember to expect God to be in every situation without having specific expectations for what He will do. Prayer doesn’t just happen during meals and before I go to bed; it is a continual act. When I am weak, He gives me strength. When I have strength, I thank Him. In all things, turn to Him.

March 15, 2012: Practicum Day 25
Teacher Rita sat in on P3 Orange today, but not Pink. Pink was a little insane. Today we focused on reading comprehension, but they would not stay quiet long enough for me to read them the story. When I finally got it read, I wrote it up on the board and had them copy it down before I put the questions on the board. Then, I had the class read the passage as a whole. Finally, before they started on their own,  I went over the approach to reading comprehension and explained to them that all the answers could be found in the passage. To make this information visual, I circled the answer to the first question in the passage. When they finally completed all the questions, I collected and corrected each book and then we went over the answers on the board. Toward the end of class, there were kids running around and screaming. I think that this is partially because they have nothing to do while I am correcting books. The lack of resources in classrooms here really puts teachers at a disadvantage. It really does get exhausting having to continually tell them to be quiet.

Between classes, I was in the teacher room having tea and chapatti. While talking to them, they asked questions about America and asked them about tongue twisters, riddles and proverbs for my Lit Project. The project requires us to collect those three things, a folk song and a story in an African language and then get it translated into English. Most of the teachers here are from Uganda so their learned language is English. When they were in school, they were taught in English, not their mother language so they cannot write their mother language, they can only speak it.

Also during break, I spent time talking to teacher Rita about the end of term exam for my P3 English classes. She gave me the exam and asked me to pull some of my review questions from it for Friday and Monday. For my Orange class, Teacher Rita asked me to use the reading comprehension passage that would be on the exam.

Teacher Rita sat in during my P3 Orange class today so they behaved much better. They respect Teacher Rita out of fear of being smacked on the head or pulled by their ear. After class, we took lunch with some of our colleagues and discussed politics in America. Then during the short break before afternoon classes began, I called Maddy, my little sister, to wish her a happy birthday! It is crazy that she is already 9 years old. I told her that her “Flat Stanley” has been on a Safari, on some hikes, and more. She was so excited!

For the afternoon, we had teacher devotions and we discussed the question, “Is there a difference between being friendly and being a friend?” One of the teachers led the devotion and it was interesting to see where she pulled from. She took some passages from Ruth and Proverbs. She stated, “Friends do not sugar coat things. They don’t praise you even when you are wrong. A friend loves always.” She went on to say, “In a relationship, I would rather be called friend than darling, because friends love you all the time, just the way you are. Darling may not last forever.”

After teacher devos, Kelli and I went out to buy some Marie Crackers and avocado. While we ate our snack, we watched Eat, Pray, Love. When dinner time came, the power went off again. This was the third night in a row. We are convinced that one of the students is doing it so that they do not have to go to preps (study time) at night. It conveniently works that it comes back on right after all the teachers have gone home J

March 16, 2012: Practicum Day 26
CRAZY DAY! I got up at 6am and did some abs, push-ups, and then I went out for a 40 minute run which felt good. It was an awesome time to spend in prayer. For Pink class today, we did revision with matching animals to their sounds and rearranging sentences to make a good story. Most of them did very well with the work. At the end of class, Teacher Rita came to help me get the class organized so that we could take a photo.

After class, we had our tea break and then I headed to P1 Blue to hang out and talk with those kids. All of the teachers have been asking us since we got here when we would come teach their class, so instead of using our spare time in sponsorship today, we went to the P1 and P2 classrooms. With P1 Blue, I started off by telling them about my family, what I like to do for fun, and other simple things about myself. When I told them that I was studying to be a primary teacher they had a little clapping celebration they did as a class. They also clapped when I told them that my mom and my sister were teachers. Because they are young, they do not have fluent English, so their teacher translated as I spoke. After I talked to them, we opened up the time to questions. They asked me anything and everything. I had one student ask, “Does your dog speak English?” Another asked, “How does a parachute work?” so then I explained the concept of skydiving. One student asked me, “How old are your grandparents?” When I told them that they were about 80 years old, the class broke out into little chatter and giggles. 80 years old in ancient to them because the death rates here in Rwanda are in the 60’s. It was very cute to see their reactions to different questions. At the end of my time with them, I had the class get together for a photo and then I headed down to Kelli’s room to take a picture of her with her class before I needed to head to Orange to teach.

Around lunch time it poured buckets and buckets of rain. After lunch, Kelli and I went to see the P2 classes. I started off telling them about myself and then asked if they had any questions. I do not know if they understood everything I said because of the language barrier, but none of the asked questions, probably because they did not know how to form their thoughts. The teacher in this room is from Uganda and does not speak any Kinyarwanda so the only language these students hear is English. This can be tricky because the sometimes students need clarification and this teacher cannot provide the students with that. After talking to them, the teacher asked me to teach a lesson. She handed me their math instruction book and said, “Here, we have covered pages 1-80, just pick something from there.” Well that was kind of broad. I got her to narrow down the topics and I did a revision lesson on < (greater than), > (less than) and = (equal to). It could have been a really fun lesson if I had time to prepare, but I made it work. I started by bringing up groups of students and asking how many kids were in each group. Then, I taught them that the big side of the symbol goes toward the big number and we would fill in which symbol was correct. After a couple interactive problems using students, I put some exercises on the board for them to compete in their books. This class was much more manageable than my P3 class because there are only 3o students. After my lesson, Kelli and I switched P2 rooms and I headed to P2 red with Teacher Aidah. Again ,I told the class about myself, and then Teacher Aidah asked me to tell them a story. Well, that was also broad. Instead, I taught them how to play “Simon Says” and we played that for the remainder of the class.

After spending time in the P2 classes, Kelli and I headed to the teacher room to get our tongue twisters and riddles translated by the Kinyarwanda teachers for our project. They had trouble translating them into English because many times the meanings had to do with traditional Rwandan culture. Most of the meanings did not make any sense, but our tongue twisters and riddles would probably not make much sense to them either.

At dinner, we talked with John Bosco for a bit. He told us that his brother has received a sponsor! Praise God! His brother has to walk over 2 miles to school every day and a sponsor will give him the opportunity to be more involved at school and in his studies. He also said that his sister will be receiving a sponsor sometime soon. Keep them in your prayers.

The school is currently trying to raise funds to build a new secondary building. On Fridays, the senior 4 kids fast to spend time in prayer for the new school. If ANL does not raise the money for the school, Senior 5 and Senior 6 students will have to go elsewhere for their schooling. Because of the success of this school, that would be a real heartbreak for these older students who have grown up with this school and attribute their success to this program.

March 17, 2012: Practicum Day 27
This morning, I woke up around 6:45 because our boys were up and about rather early. To start off the morning, I typed some journals and did my abs/push-ups. Most of our students are doing work this weekend trying to prepare for end of term exams next week so there is not much going on around campus. For lunch, Kelli and I decided to venture out for lunch to a place we saw while we were running one morning. It was about a 20 minute walk to a Motel/ Restaurant called East Land Motel. We weren’t really sure what to expect, but the building looked nice so we figured we would give it a try. We went in and the seating was very nice. We ordered some Fantas and when the waiter returned, he informed us that they had rice, beans, beef, matoke and chips only. He spoke English, but I could tell he was not completely comfortable with the language. The food was very good and to finish off the meal, they brought us a few pieces of pineapple. We weren’t really sure how much it was going to cost us, but we couldn’t imagine it would be too much. Total, for 2 meals and 3 fantas, it only cost 6,500 (about $12.50 USD). After lunch, we walked back and I did some hand washing and then I typed more journals while we watched The Help. After the movie, we went out for a picture walk around Kayona. We  went to our internet cafĂ©, the soccer field, our 3 shops where we buy water and crackers, the roundabout, the market, and then we finished our walk by going in the back gate of campus to get some photos. It is always enjoyable to get out and go for a walk through the community. While we were at the market, I had women bringing me their children to take photos. They loved having their pictures J
For the evening, we made thank you notes for the few students who have been helping us around campus for the last month. Following dinner, we watched High school Musical with our boys. Not sure why, but they absolutely LOVE High School Musical. It is always funny to see the 18 boys huddled around the little laptop screen watching the movies. They are great kids and we are going to miss them!

March 18, 2012: Practicum Day 28
Well, it has been a rather uneventful day! We went to the 8am English service her at ANL and then we spent the rest of the day relaxing. Most of the kids were doing revision today to prepare for tomorrows exams. We watched the Proposal and I typed up the rest of my journal entries. I got to talk to my dad for a bit on the phone and then I took care of some emails and tried to get some logistics figured out for my fall semester at Messiah. Kelli then taught me how to play Cribbage, an old school card game, and that was about it for the day.

The only place we have really had to “get away” has been our room. In our room, there is a bed, a toilet, a shower and a sink. That being said, our bed acts as, our bed, a table, an occasional plate for a snack, a desk, and a couch. We felt as though it needed a name of its own so we came up with Clabedeste, a good combination of all its functions.

If you made it through this post, CONGRATULATIONS! I will buy you ice cream when I return to the US! Props to you :) 

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Patience is a Virtue: Practicum Day 7-14

Let me just start by saying that I am REALLY sorry that this post is a novel. We haven't had internet on Practicum. Our internet stick hates us. Check out this link and you will see why the internet isn't so hot...

Anchor Falls on Internet in East Africa

Enjoy reading literally, everything that I have been doing the past week! Much love from Rwanda.


February 27, 2012: Practicum Day 7
This morning, we went to church here on campus. The church has both an English and Kinyarwanda service, so we went to the English service from 8-10. I am not sure how I really felt about the service. The pastor spoke from Genesis 37:3-11 about “the vision” and how some visions must be kept a secret. He did not present anything biblical to what he was saying, so I was very skeptical about the whole sermon.  I would love to hear from another viewpoint, how “the vision” relates to these verses.  Prior to the sermon, the church asked for testimonies, and then they make the visitors introduce themselves. At the very end of the service, the pastor asks if there is anyone who would like to give their life to Christ. I have found that these three actions are very common in the Africa Church.

Several times during the church service, I felt like things were being forced upon me. During worship, if someone sat down, the worship team leader would insist they stood up and worship god with their body. Or, they would insist that everyone raises their hands to the Lord. At times, these things made me feel uncomfortable because it is not how I worship.  The African Church is much more charismatic which is something I am not used to.

After church, we went with Moses to get white computer paper and toilet paper from his office so that we could begin with our lesson plans for Monday.  The rest of our day, from 11-6:45, we worked on preparing things for teaching this week. I will be teaching numbers 1-20, counting by 10s and writing all numbers. I made sheets of paper posters with the number, the words, and a picture for each number 1 to 20. I also made ones that said 1st (first), 2nd (second), and so forth. I made a set for both the pink and orange P3 rooms. While we worked all day we stuck in the movie, The Guardian, and Harry Potter 4. After working all day, we went out and talked with several secondary students while we waited for lunch. We continue to meet new people every day while we are here which is a blast, but it is hard to remember names. I find myself in a situation not remembering someone’s name, but they remember mine because I am one of two Mzungu girls around here. For dinner, we ate in Orchard dorm which is also where they fed us lunch today. We are not sure why, but we are assuming it’s because it is a weekend.

After dinner, we came back and worked on the Water Project. We decided to name it Water for Wisdom because it will be on a school compound. We also chose the name because through clean water, children miss less days of school do to sickness and can decrease the absences and increase attendance which can lead to gaining knowledge.

As I enter this week of teaching, it is my prayer that I can find my strength in God and not become anxious. I am nervous about teaching because of the different circumstances here, but I know God has it all under control.

February 27, 2012: Practicum Day 8
Early morning! One of our boys was up at 4:30am filling buckets of water in the shower right across the hall so that he could wash the floors before the other boys woke up. I had my alarm set for 5:15am so that I could get up, run, shower, and be at class by 7:00am. Yes, their classes start at 7:00am. I could not go back to sleep once I work up at 4:30 so I just laid in bed until my alarm went off. When I finally got up to run, it was still pitch black so I did not go running because I was not comfortable running in the dark. Instead, I did ab ripper and push-ups in the baby area of our room that does not have our bed or our suitcases. At 6:50, I left to go find Teacher Rita to tell her that I would not be teaching P. She said no problem, took the skims back and everything was fine. I was worried that she would be upset, but she wasn’t. All we have to do is tell them what we want to do and they say, “Oh great! No problem.” I blogged and read a little bit until I needed to start work at 8. At 8, Kelli went to class so I worked on editing and citing our water project which is almost complete at this point except for a logistics table that we need specifics from headmaster for. When Kelli got back from teaching at 9:15, we headed to Gashupa’s office to do some sponsorship work. From 9:30 to 12:15, we went through files to check if each fine contained a consent form, a picture, and a current grade report. It was fun to see the students who have been part of the sponsorship program for several years because we could see their progression of pictures. The files also contained sponsor letters and family information. Helping with sponsorship has hit me much harder than I was expecting it to. All the families are living in poverty, and many are only living with one parent. One little girl lived with her mother in extreme poverty and her father is in prison because he participated in the 199 genocide. My heart breaks for each of these children and their families. I hope and pray that the sponsors of these children can love on them and encourage them throughout their schooling and development. These children are sponsored through African New Life Sponsorship Program.

After lunch, I headed to the P3 Pink room for class. I had worked it out with Teacher Rita on Friday that I would be observing today and she would teach so that I could get a better understanding of a normal classroom session (last week they were doing revision for midterms). Well, observing was NOT the case for me. I got there and she expressed how tired she was and left the classroom. I was on! Luckily I had prepared my number signs, but the rest of the lesson was made up as I went. Then, I thought class was only 45 minutes, but no, I was wrong again! I started by having one student come up at a time and hold a number poser. As the students came up, I would have the class repeat the number as a group. When all 10 were standing, I would skip around to see if they really knew them. As a whole, they were very god with their numbers, so I wasn’t sure how the rest of class would go. After that activity, I had 10 students come up and hold the 1st through 10th signs. We reviewed them the same way. After stating the numbers 1st through 10,” the students took out their English books. I instructed students to write using numbers, words and figures, and then when they were finished to start the exercises I had written on the board. This was a semi disaster because I had some students doing the exercises first, some mixing the two activities, and some not working at all. As students finished their work, I walked around to check their work, and I gave them a star for their good work. With 50+ students, it is hard to check work during class because by the time I check the 50th kids work, the 1st kid has been sitting around doing nothing. There is a gap that is nearly impossible to fill here in Africa due to the lack of resources. When we were done with those activities,  I attempted to play a game with them. I wanted them to get in groups when I called out a number. For example, I say “5” and then students cluster in groups of 5. They were clueless! I had kids running to the front with me and huddling me, so I improvised and sent kids back to their seat so that we only had 5 in the front.

The academic schedules are very strange so some days my P3 Pink class has 1.5 hours and P3 orange has 45 minutes or vice versa. It ends up that both classes have 2, 1.5 hour sessions and 3, 45 minutes sessions. So when that hour and a half was over, I headed to P3 orange to repeat the same lesson. This class was only 45 minutes and went much more smoothly. I did the same activity with the posters, but I waited to write the exercises on the board until after they had copied all the numbers, words and figures into their books. I had the students put their hands on their head when they were finished. I did this in order to mix up what they are used to. They are used to a very formal classroom setting, but I want to give them the experience of a different teaching style. When they had their hands on their head, I would go and check their work. That being said, it is normal for them to come to the teacher and shove their books in your face, but I refused to look at anyone’s books who were not sitting down like I had asked. We did not get to the 1st through 10th activities because of the shorter time slot, but eventually the learning material will even out across the two classes. Overall, I learned from the day, It was nice being thrown into it because I didn’t have the time to worry. I do not know how tomorrow will go with 2, 1:30 minute sessions. I have to teach the numbers 11 to 20 for an hour and a half. It is time to get creative! But at the same time, it is hard to get creative because students do not understand that type of learning style. The students are not very good visual learners and when I try to do interactive activities the class breaks out in Chaos of standing and snapping to answer questions, or running around to move to a different place in the classroom that I have asked them to do.

When class ended at 3:30, I was done for the day. I went back to my room and got ready to go for a run. The run was very refreshing because it was slightly raining. When I got back from my run, I found Kelli in the family room with our boys. When I came in, they proceeded to debate with us about an underground, satanic religion in America that they called “The Eliminators.” They proceeded to tell us that “The Eliminators” killed Michael Jackson and Kennedy. They were telling us that the hand symbol is “I love you” in sign language. The more they tried to explain to us what they were talking about, the more skeptical I became about what they were telling me. When I asked them where they heard about it, they said, “The radio and the newspapers.” I wanted to reply and ask them, “And what did the radio have to say during the 1994 genocide? Obviously it was not a positive during those times. It is hard to get across to these boys that they cannot believe everything they or hear. It is hard to get across to them that anyone can add something to the internet and certain people will see it as truth. They do not fully understand the internet so this concept is more or less foreign to them.

At dinner, we spoke with the Moses, the DOS (Director of Studies) and he expressed that the students enjoyed us and were asking if we would be here a while. It was nice to hear the positive feedback from students after the first day. It will be a continual battle for me, but it will be a battle where I know I will grow and learn a lot. It is a good time to reflect and see what I truly think about teaching.



February 27, 2012: Practicum Day 9
This morning was a 6:15 wake up and 8am work time. I went and worked at sponsorship from 8-9:15 doing the same work we did yesterday. The files are very disorganized inside so in addition to checking for certain paperwork, I also put the papers in order from the most recent to the oldest. I had P3 Pink from 9:45-11:15 and it went much more smoothly with them today. I designed the class the same way as yesterday, however, we did numbers 11-20 and reviewed 1st through 10th. The students were very cooperative and I enjoyed teaching the lesson. After lunch, I had P3 orange, and they behaved much worse than yesterday. 1st, we were locked out of the room, and then the kids tried to sit in different seats, but I noticed because certain students ended up without a seat. I was sort of being treated like a substitute teacher which was frustrating. I had to spend so much time and energy just trying them to sit that it took away from the lesson. The beginning of the lesson went well with the students holding posters and writing the numbers in in their books. That being said, they would continually try to move seats. This class hadn’t done 1st through 10th yet, but when we started to do posters and write the numbers with words that I posted in the back of the room, the lesson went downhill. They were up and moving everywhere and they didn’t understand the concept of sit down! I tried to stop and have them stand up and shake out their energy, but that didn’t work either. We were still about to get most of the work done. Later in the class, Moses came in and the room got quiet. He spoke to them in Kinyarwanda telling them “you wanted a guest teacher and now you are going to misbehave? We will send her to the P1 and P2 classes.” For the rest of the class, they worked diligently.

Classes were stressful for both Kelli and I, so after class we went out into Kayonza for a bit. We went for a walk to the market and bought pineapples and avocado. The pineapples only cost 250 franc a piece and the avocados were 3 for 100 franc. We got some mango juice and crackers to keep in our room for a snack. When we got back, we got a plate and knife from the kitchen to cut our pineapples. Moses asked where we were coming from and he asked, “Who did you go out with?” When we told him we went alone, he responded, “How did you manage?” They just want to be very hospitable, but sometimes they think we can’t survive on our own in Rwanda.  We then talked to John Bosco, one of the secondary students for a while. He is an incredibly driven student who not only excels in the classroom, but he also works to pay for his father diabetic medicine. Kevin went on a house visit to John Boscos house and on that day, John’s father came to Christ. John said it was a day he will never ever forget! After talking to him, we headed back to our room to do ab ripper.  Then I washed the tub, sink, toilet and hand washed some clothes.

The power went out in the early evening so we had to eat dinner in the dark with a candle in the dining hall. The rest of the night we spent working on lesson plans (which I have clue what to do!), journaling, and reading.

Classes like P3 Orange today make me not want to be a teacher. I love kids, but I want to do more than just tell them to sit down or put red stars on their papers. This experience is the perfect time to figure out what I really want to do for the rest of my life. I pray that while I am here I can have an impact on these children. I pray that God will work in me to be a light to these children.

February 29, 2012: Practicum Day 10
Today, teaching started at 8:30am in P3 Pink. It was only a 45 minute period which makes things go much more smoothly. In class, we went over counting by 10’s in both classes. I started by having one student come up at a time and hold a sticker strip with 10 stickers on it. Each time a student came up they would count their stickers and tell the class. Then, as a group, the students would count 10, 20, 30, etc. When we made it to 100 with 10 different students holding strips of 10, they all sat down and wrote the number and the words from 10 to 100, counting by 10’s. I wrote it on the blackboard as an example and they simply copied it into their English books. When they were finished with that exercise, I had students come up and hold a strip that 10 or that had 1-9 on them. This exercise was intended to help the students understand all numbers from 1 to 100. They were able to see that by counting by tens, you can then write any number. The sticker activity the second time showed them how to make numbers such as 29, 37, 95, etc. After that, the students sat down and I had everyone in the classroom make a circle around the classroom. They didn’t understand what I was saying so they made a circle in the front of the room with 50 people. It was mass chaos. I eventually got them into a circle around the room and we counted around the circle. It was a good exercise for pronunciation practice, and they enjoyed counting themselves. The last activity of the period was exercises on the board. Checking them is still chaos, but overall, the class went well. At 9:15, I headed up to sponsorship to go through some more files until I had to teach P3 Orange at 10:30 for a double period. I ran the class the same way, only we reviewed 1st through 10th and completed the shape exercises that P3 Pink did the day before. Because of the way the time slots are set up, it is hard to keep the two classes at the same spot. In order to be prepared and insure that both classes get through the material, I have to have my lesson plans done for at least two days in advance. This class struggled with looking at the line of shapes and telling the location (1st, 2nd, etc.) of the specified shape. When we finished the location exercises, they moved onto counting by 10s and completed all the same exercise as the P3 Pink class. Overall, the class went very well and the students were well behaved. I am guessing this is because Moses talked to them before the period started. The Orange class is going to have an overall better experience with me because of the trial and error process that occurs in the Pink class first. After teaching Pink, I can then tweak and fix my mistakes for the Orange class. After the orange class, we headed to lunch and then worked on lesson plans for tomorrow and made quizzes for Friday. It is hard to make a quiz for a 45 minute period because there is a wide range of ability level in each class. For the quiz, I asked students to write in words numbers 1 to 10, state how many figures were in a given pictures (ex: three circles), look at a line of shapes and state the location of a shape I asked for, write numbers 11 to 20 in words, and then write other numbers such as 30, 42, 57, and so forth. We wrote the quizzes on a piece of paper and then gave it to Moses to make copies of. I have planned a game of Numbers Jeopardy to play with the students tomorrow in order to review for the quiz. After writing our quizzes, we went to sponsorship again. When I am going through the files and looking at family descriptions on the forms, my heart often breaks. I could not imagine being some of these children who have families who are struggling severely. I came across two little girls who were living with a single mother because their fathers were in prison for participating in the genocide. I could not imagine having to be a parent and explaining that to my young child. It is sad, but it is a blessing that many of them have sponsors.

I can’t decide if this whole practicum experience is going to get harder or easier. I enjoy working with the little kids (and sometimes being in the classroom), but I get very frustrated with students who just don’t try. I still have the feeling of wanting to impact kids, just not necessarily in the classroom. I know that God will continue to teach me and guide me throughout my experience here in Kayonza. He is already teaching me patience with my students and the ability to not put so much importance on time (like I wrote about in my very first blog entry before coming to Africa). I pray that I continue to let God’s will be done and that He will show me what to do and that I do not base it on myself.

After sponsorship, we went to our room and relaxed until dinner. We finished the last 45 minutes of Take The Lead, which we had been watching while we made our quizzes earlier in the day. After we finished the movie, Kelli took a nap and I went for a run. As I reached the main road which goes toward Rwamagana, a man ran with me for nearly 15 minutes. He tried talking to me, but I had no clue what he was saying. Then, he proceeded to run next to me, talk to himself, a listen to music from his phone out loud. But he was not the only one to join me on my run today. As we ran, 10 children began running with me too. When I finally turned around, the man stopped running with me.

When I got back to campus, I saw a few little boys playing with a soccer ball so I jumped in. We juggled and just messed around with the ball for a while. They had good foot skills for just little guys and I could tell they just loved the game.

At dinner, we sat with 2 sixth grade teachers who were singing our praises about our teaching methods. They asked us to teach a lesson for them so that they can “see our ways.” It is semi humorous and a little frustrating that they think we know what we are doing because in reality, I have only had 5 education classes thus far.

Also at dinner, we gave Moses our quizzes so that he can check to make sure that the students will understand our wording of the questions, and then he can get copies made. He was very impressed and said, “It is almost like you have been teaching in African schools forever.” It is encouraging to hear people tell us we are doing a good job because at times, I feel like I am a chicken with my head cut off.

Two random pieces of info for the day:

Around campus, it is a birthday tradition to make someone cry on their birthday. They say, “We came into this world crying, so we should on the day of our birth.”
Josh and Tami are one step closer to bringing home their little boy from Ethiopia. There was another boy referral today so they are tied for first with a few other families waiting to see their little boy’s face.

March 1, 2012: Practicum Day 11
On Thursdays, I have class at 7:45, so I wake up slightly earlier to run, shower, and get to class on time. On the second half of my run, back toward ALF, some of my students ran with me because they were walking to school. The last 3 mornings, we have had avocado and crackers for breakfast. This morning, P3 Pink was interesting. I got there and told the class that they had a quiz tomorrow and today we would be playing a review game. We played jeopardy, and it was LOUD! They get very excited and a bit carried away when the teams are boys versus girls.  I was not expecting them to understand the jeopardy concept, but they did! They understand picking the different point values and all went for the 500 questions first. They did not understand the categories were written at the top, but that was not vital to playing the game. While they understood the game, the part that they didn’t understand was being quiet. They would cheer when the opposite team got it wrong, they would cheer when they got it right, they would stand up, should “teacher me, teacher me” or “no teacher no!” Headmaster came in to try to get them to quiet down, but as soon as he left, the volume went up again. Again, it is frustrating that the only punishment the students respect is physical punishment. When class was over, I tried to tell them what would be on the quiz, but the majority of them wouldn’t listen. I told them, “If you do not do well tomorrow, I will not feel bad for you because you are not listening!” Part of me will not feel bad if they do poorly tomorrow because of their inability to listen, but the other part of me wants them all to do really well because I have been teaching them the material for the last week.

After Pink, I went to sponsorship and worked on checking/organizing files some more and had our daily 9:45am tea time. I worked there until my second class at 11:15. I was dreading Orange class because of how poorly Pink behaved during the game earlier in the morning. When I got there, they were all seated and behaving like angles. I told them that if they stood up their team would lose all their points. I also explained them how to do silent cheers, which worked well as long as I prompted it. There was some standing and cheering, but for the most part it was controllable. Overall, the orange class behaved very well and I think they enjoyed the review game.

I am nervous for both classes to take the quiz, mainly because I still do not feel like they understand the 1st through 10th activity that I try to do with them (line of pictures and tell me what place a certain picture is in). I am also worried that they will not be able to spell the numbers. I can ask any one of them and they will spit out all the information, but when it comes to asking it on paper, they freeze.

One of my favorite parts of the classroom is when I enter into the room. As I walk it, the class stands up and says, “Good Morning Teacher Ali!” I say, “Good Morning class, how are you?” They reply, “We are fine, thank you Teacher Ali.” I tell them, “You may be seated.” And they say, “Thank you Teacher Ali.” It is one of the cutest things J

Random classroom fact: To erase the board I have to ask a student for the duster (aka eraser). It is one students job to keep the duster for the classroom.

For lunch, we had rice, beans, and CHIPS (aka French fries).  What a day…we added something new to the menu. That being said, they put the chips on top of the beans so they tasted like rice and beans.

In the afternoon, we were supposed to do home visits with Charles Gashumba (the man who is head of sponsorship), but he was called into Kigali last minute for some business. I was bummed because I was really looking forward to it, but hopefully we will get the opportunity to do it some other time.

Instead of going out on home visits, we went to teacher devotions which go from 3-4. Today, there was a guest speaker/pastor and he went until 5:30! Unfortunately, it was very hard to understand what he was saying because he would not let the translator finish before he began with his next thought. After teacher devotions I got to talk to Amber for 45 minutes or so which was awesome! I got to wish her a happy birthday, hear about her life, and catch her up on mine. The rest of the evening, we read and wrote in our journals, and then we headed to bed.

March 2, 2012: Practicum Day 12
Today I gave my first exam as a teacher. BIG MISTAKE! I was supposed to administer my first exam at 8:30 so I went to pick up the copies of the exam from Moses at 8:15. When I got to Moses, he informed me that they were not ready and that I was to teach a different lesson during my exam time slot and then take another teachers time slot to give my exam. My first thought was, “What in the world am I going to teach? I have already been teaching numbers for a week.” Luckily, I had written the exam in my journal, so I pulled from that and wrote questions on the board to prepare them for the exam later in the day. I informed them that the picture sequence I wrote on the board matched exactly what would be on the quiz. Many of them would not pay attention so I said, “I am just trying to help, it is your fault if you do poorly because I am giving you the questions.” The students spent the majority of the period doing the exercises and then we went over them at the end of class.

After that class, it was tea time and then I went to Orange to give them their exam. Teacher Rita was there to get them started on the exam, but she left and it turned into chaos. Kids were talking, getting up, looking at each other’s papers, and there was nothing I could do about it because there are so many students. Several of them turned in their papers having done #1 incorrect so I tried to instruct them several times how to do it, but they would not listen. As they handed their exams in, I had to send the majority of them back to their seats to fix their work. I also had students stealing exams to take home and write answer for other kids. As a punishment, I made students sit with their faces in the corner or against the wall. I made them switch positions every time I walked past and if they moved when I did not instruct them to, I told them I would rip up their papers.

I then had another short break until 11:15. During that time, I discussed with Teacher Rita what I should be teaching this coming week. I will be teaching the alphabet for the first portion of the week, and comparisons for the second half the week. After speaking with her, I went to the library to check out a P3 English book in order to find some sample questions. From 11:15 to 12, I administered the exam to P3 Pink. They would not get settled, so another teacher came in to help. When I began handing out the test, I instructed them that if they stood up or talked before everyone was done, I would rip up their exam. This class was more well behaved than P# Orange, but there was still some cheating. I had one student using his book, so I took his exam, sent him outside, and made him start over. As everyone finished, it started to get loud, so I put the people who were still working outside to finish up.

For lunch we had rice with meat, but my meat was the intestines. While at lunch, we talked with a teacher about grades, and he informed us that a 50% is average. After lunch, we headed to the bus park to buy tickets to go back to Kigali for the weekend. We got tickets to leave at 3, so we went back, got our stuff, and cleaned up. We gave Jackie (the woman’s room that we are staying in) our key so that she could sleep in the room for the weekend because she has officially returned from leave. Gashumba (the man in charge of sponsorship), is trying to figure out if we will need to change rooms or not. We told everyone that we are leaving so that no one thinks they “lost us.” Usually, if someone doesn’t see us for a few hours, they say, “We lost you.”

The bus back to Kigali went very smoothly. When we arrived at the Ramera Bus Park in Kigali, we hopped on a bus toward Chez Lando which is the stop for where we live. Overall, it cost us less than 3 USD and took us about an hour and a half. It was definitely worth it! I looked forward to coming home all day. We got to eat real food, made by Janet and enjoyed the company of everyone. We have to pay 2000 franc to eat while we are at home because they have already paid for us to eat rice and beans at ANL in Kayonza. I spent the rest of the night grading papers. I have not yet taken the average, but some students did very well (41/41) and others did very poorly (2/41).

We are halfway through our practicum experience which is insane! As I think about teaching, I have several different feelings. I absolutely love working with kids, but as far as the classroom goes, I do not really enjoy writing lesson plans, or grading papers. It is frustrating having no respect from the students, because I have no form of discipline. It is very hard to get any lessons done because there are 50 students who turn to their neighbor and talk. At this point, I really don’t want to be a teacher. I don’t know if that is simply because of the African setting, or because that is not what I want to do the rest of my life. I have been so trained to the American Education System full of resources that this is very difficult. All that being said, I know that God will continue to teach me through this experience. I pray that I will come out of it with a more clear answer of the path which I will take.

During my devotions, I turned to Isaiah 40:28-31 where it states, “The Lord is the Everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the youth men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up on wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” There are times during this experience when I feel as though I have no strength or feel as though I cannot last through another session in the classroom (in a sense I feel faint), but God renews my strength and helps me every time I am in the classroom.

March 3, 2012: Practicum Day 13
Such a good day back in Kigali! Kimmie and I woke up and headed to ABC Bagel (a business started by Americans and the Mzungu hangout on Saturday mornings). We went to volunteer because they were short on workers, and business was CRAZY! I was taking orders, manning the cash register at times, and packing up other goods that customers bought, such as tortilla, bagel chips, cream cheese, salsa, etc. The store opened at 9, and by 10:30, all the doughnuts were sold out because several customers came in and ordered 2 dozen plus doughnuts. By 12:30/1, we had sold out of all bagels, and doughnuts. As I worked at the counter, it was fun to hear all the different accents of the customers. I always wonder what everyone’s purpose is here in Rwanda. What brought them here? How long have they been here? What is their purpose here? God has placed all these people here for His good, and that is such a beautiful thing.

After volunteering, we went home and had Janet’s pumpkin soup and watched “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.” I finished grading papers, and found that the overall average was a C, which I was happy with considering the teachers told me to expect a 50% average. Part of me questions their grades because many of the cheated. I also began to work on ABC lesson plans for Monday.

After the movie, Julie, Kimmie and I went to Emeralds Coffee/Guest House to get some coffee and catch up. We all shared the ups and downs of our practicums. All of us have both the positives and negatives of our practicums, but we all know that God is working at all of the sites. Despite the fact that it may not be exactly what we wanted, He is placing opportunities in our lives to connect with the Rwandan people which are a huge part of this study abroad experience. 

For the rest of the evening, we ate dinner and then headed to “Heaven Restaurant” with everyone who was home for the weekend to see a movie. On Saturday nights, the restaurant is designed to be dinner and a movie, or you can just go for the movie. It is on a patio that is outdoors with roofing over half of the area. It has a big screen, tables, and some movie chairs. For only 2500 franc (a little less than 5 USD), we got to see a movie, had unlimited popcorn, and a free soda. That beats the 9 bucks for JUST the movie at home. The movie of the night was “The Iron Lady.”

When we came back from the movie, we hung out and enjoyed being reunited and in the company of each other. I look forward to continuing the building of relationships with the rest of the group when we return to Kigali.

I have been going through Romans recently, and chapter 8, verses 18 through 39 really struck me. A prominent theme in these verses is about God’s goodness. In verse 28, it states, “for those who love God, all things work together for good.” A few verses later, in verse 31, it reads, “And what then shall we say to these things? IF GOD IS FOR US, WHO CAN BE AGAINST US?” This verse makes me feel like all things are possible. With the strength and goodness of God, we have the ability to do all things. Especially through this experience, when I feel incapable of being the sole teacher in the classroom, I remember that by God’s grace and His goodness, I can and I will. He is for me and if I am working to further His Kingdom, He will give me strength. He will not allow me to be torn down.

March 4, 2012: Practicum Day 14
This morning, I went to Africa New Life, Kigali for church. The sanctuary was very nice. It had tiers going down, and the stage had several musical instruments. The walls were pained with fabric squares which made the interior design very aesthetically pleasing.  The pastor, Pastor Charles, spoke on Prayer. He started in 1 Samuel 12:23 and posed the question, is it a sin to fail to pray? When we decrease in prayer, we are more vulnerable to sin. So, when we skimp on prayer, how does it affect our everyday lives? He then moved on to Ephesians 6:18 and stressed the idea of PRAYING AT ALL TIMES! By being in constant prayer, in every occasion, we can “extinguish the flaming darts of the evil one.”

The pastor then offered up some quotes:

  • “The evangelization of the world depends first upon the revival of prayer. Deeper than the need for man---aye, deep at the bottom of our spiritless life, is the need for the forgotten secret of prevailing world-wide prayer.” This quote really hit me, because I often find myself frustrated with the youth of America. The high school and college years are driven by alcohol and sex. So often, people do not respect themselves. Much of the youth in America is living for themselves, not a God who is greater and much bigger than us. God gives me a reason to live. It saddens me to see people give in to the media or temptation just to have a popular social status. This quote made me realize, that it is first through prayer that I can have an impact on the lives of these young individuals.
  • Martin Luther stated, “I have so much to do that I shall spend the first 3 hours in prayer.” I hope that I can get to a point in my life where I am saying this too!
  • Pastor Charles then went on to say, “We are in a hurry to finish prayer, but we aren’t in a hurry to eat or finish a movie.” This was a very convicting statement because I often find myself doing just this. I find myself cutting my time in prayer short so that I can journal or read my book for class. I pray that God can help build me up in prayer. I pray that I can strengthen myself in prayer and find myself in constant prayer because it is through prayer that I find peace in Jesus Christ.
Overall, the service was very, very nice! The children’s choir from Kayonza came to perform because the Board of Directors is in Rwanda for the first time.
Well, that was church. But this morning, I woke up at 6am to an insane rain storm! There were cracks of lightening and rolls of thunder. The lightening was hitting right down in the valley. I wish I was awake for this!!! I love rain and thunder storms J when we went out to get a taxi to head to church, there were no motos or taxis in sight. When the rain comes, people disappear and the streets go dead. Later in the day, when the rain had stopped, the place where the motos and taxis sit was full and people were out. At church, the pastor said several times that the service started late and was emptier because of the rain. You would have thought everyone was snowed in! After church, we headed back to the Go-Ed house and I packed up my stuff and made some chocolate chip cookies.

We headed out of Kigali, back to Kayonza around 5. The bus on our way back was a small one crammed with 4 people per bench and all of our stuff. It makes stops more frequently than the larger busses, but it still got us back just fine! When we got back, we bought some boxes of water and headed back to campus. We will be staying in the same room, but Jackie and he daughter will keep their stuff in our room and come as they need. Unfortunately, having two more suitcases in the room makes it crammed, but it is not a problem, we will manage. Before prayers, we gave our boys some chocolate chip cookies and watched Step Up with them. Then, we did some journaling and headed to bed. I am praying that God will give me a positive heart for the week and that I will rely on His strength to get me through.

IF YOU MADE IT THROUGH THAT WHOLE POST, I AM IMPRESSED! I can't wait to be blogging normal again back at the Go-Ed house. This truly has been an incredible experience thus far. It is hard to believe that my time here in Rwanda is almost half way over. I am blessed to be here.